Time Change

Tonight,  it is time for us Canadians to change our time.

As I am writing this blog, it is 6:51 at night right now, and new time we have on the other clock I already manually change read 5:51pm.

So, tonight I will head to bed the same time I do without changing my clock yet,that way, I am actually adding an hour more to my sleep and then I have to worry about changing it in the morning.

So that  I don’t run into a problem showing  up early tomorrow for my meeting, I left a note  on my desk   “first thing to do in the morning  “change the time”.

Make sure you do the same.

Please do not forget to change your clocks manually tonight.

ARE WE BECOMING A NO-BATH SOCEITY?

Are we really becoming a no -bath society?

Here in  Canada, we do have some weird weather sometime.

It can be super cold, in fact last year we have a – 40  degrees celsius that schools have to closed because buses are not running.

Granted that you live in a country like mine, are we suppose to forget about those daily showers either long or short ?

If you asked me if  daily showers becoming a thing of the past.

I would say  yes.

I am sorry to say this but for some people it can be .

In fact, I had been noticing this trend for a while, did you notice it ?

In the past few years beauty companies have subtly begun catering to the unwashed crowd.

We have multiple hair care brands that introduced spray-on dry shampoos, which masks an oily appearance and our not-so- fresh consumers with an extension on their next hair wash.

We even have a fabric refresher which make our  dirty jeans and stinky t-shirt underarms smell as if  they’re fresh from the wash.

And the fashion industry is popularizing the “unclean fad”  with  the grunge look , messy and disheveled hair and layer clothing.

What else can I say?

And here’s the catch why this trend is so popular.

It had been said that there are some real benefits to it.

For example less showering  is eco-friendly according to some groups.Doing so makes us use less water and cleaning products.

Second, there is a physical benefit. Infrequent scrubbing can actually be beneficial to both our hair and skin.Washing too often may be stripping away our skin’s essential oils, which can lead to dryness.

Granted that these can all be considered real benefits.

But  daily showering makes me feel good and clean.

Besides, messy hair and body odor is completely offensive .

Lastly, I do not want to be someone who everyone secretly thinks smells!

Would you shower or skip ?

You be the judge.

My Personal Thoughts on Halloween Risks.

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It is a time for good goodies again and children all over here are busy and excited about the long running tradition of Canadian children ….trick or treat…

For most parents, there is nothing wrong with the tradition and that it has to continue to be passed on to future generation of children to enjoy with.

I am not a big fan of Halloween, maybe because I grew up in  a place where it is  not so much widely popular for kids at that time, now times were changing and it is now being enjoyed by children.

Why I am not a big fan of Halloween?

I have two reasons.

First, the risks of accidents for children and teenagers specially unsupervised trick or treating in the dark  is present.

Second, too much of the sweet stuff . We all know that children have all sweet tooth, but sometimes during Halloween, you are for sure will be a bit of a shock of the amount of sugar your children will be having for a night.

If  I tell you that  I accompany my son to trick or treat every year and when we arrive home, it is amazing how much sugary stuff is loaded on his trick or treat bag.

Plenty.

Maybe to say it the most but not to exaggerate is  3  months stock of goodies for sugary cravings.

Mostly, when trick or treat is done, I habitually sort out the goodies with my son.

We would have two separate ziplock.

We sort it from the high-sugar content to mild sugar content. ( it is just our own way of sorting it out )

I took away the high-sugary ones. I do not know how you will find it but it does not bother my son knowing that  we had been doing it for years now, so he is happy with the less sugary coated bars.

It is just my way to “police” every sugary content to show how much I wanted my son to learn that indulging in sweet stuff  needs moderation.

Tomorrow, we will go trick or treat again.

I just prepared our costumes and the bags for the goodies.

I expect a load of sweet stuff and a busy street with a children’s giggles.

Needs versus Wants

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I needed a brand  new winter tires, and my dearest hubby said ” your old all -season tires is in good shape.  I sulk.

My son needed a new  Nike running shoes, and I said your old runners still in good shape.  He Sulk.

Ever find yourself in similar situation?

First of all, I want to establish the fact that we have few actual needs.

Most of what we call needs are really wants.

Certainly we prefer calling them needs because that makes them seem essential to our very own lives.

We might be reluctant to ask for and expect someone to indulge us in whatever we want, but we have no such compunctions against expecting that treatment when our needs are concerned.

So our communication is peppered with the word. “I need that, I need this,” some of us will insists, to which someone will respond , ” No, you don’t “.

There are things, so many of them that we want everyday, or five times a day but  really some or most of these things we can survive very well without.

Probably our actual needs are only food, water, shelter, and medical care. I’d throw in clothing and love, but I suspect we could survive without even those if we had to.

But don’t you think life would be grim if  all we ever had met were our needs?

There is nothing wrong with wanting more, and we have every right to express our feelings, thoughts, and descriptions of what we want out of life.

But the bottom line is …

We simply must recognize the difference between those wants and our needs.

Next time  everyone in my household said, ” I need this or need that”  (including me of course) …I guess someone has to simply evaluate if   there is a need or it is just simply a want.

Drainer people

If I have to identify the biggest cause of family unhappiness, I’d say it’s the set of expectations we have about family members.

In most cases, each one of us has had twenty to thirty years to formulate our beliefs as to what families  should be like, and we think we know what to expect when we finally start to make our own families.

Whether we want to emulate the relationship we saw in our own family or completely avoid interaction with it , we have definite ideas about how a family should be.

Interacting with one’s own family can  often be difficult. And when you get a bunch of in-laws  with their in-laws as well, you’ve got trouble. 

Sometimes, we have what I call drainer people in our lives. And that could come in the form of a family member say ..our brother’s dearest wife, or it could be our boss, or a co-worker , it could even be the very people in our spiritual community.

They drain us with much energy and leave us feeling washed out. They ca n be controlling or rigid and  domineering . Drainer people are swamped with pain and problems that they’re absolutely miserable individuals.

They are  people who had been hurt so deeply and are carrying around such enormous loads of pain and complaints they’re looking for someone to blame- and we ‘re a handy target.

Their negativity and pessimism is a strong force that can suck us  dry.

At some point, in cases like that, retreat.

I have a recent experience with a drainer. I feel victimized . When we feel this way we want to escape from it.  That’s an innate protective habit. Run. Avoid. Shut Out.

Sometimes we feel there is just no hope mending broken fences.

We may try to be nice, considerate, open, pleasing, thoughtful and every other positive trait you c an conjure  up. You try to communicate respectfully, pull out your best listening skills. You invite them for dinner.

You get only hostility in return.

 Eventually you stop trying. It could be lovely  if we didn’t  have to endure this strained stage. Some of us can be lucky but the majority of us seem to experience it for some period of time, perhaps  like an initiation.

It helps to know that this strain is common; we’re not the only ones enduring it. Most of us get over it.

But sometimes, we just have to let go of drainer people in our lives.

Retreat.

Retreating is not the same as rejecting. It isn’t punishing with hostile coolness.

It’s simply giving the other party or parties the space they seem to want , not imposing our company on them and yet,  being as cordial  as we would be toward any acquaintance.

Each of us get to decide what we will do in any circumstance.

Letting go of a drainer can really help us refocus, rebuild and reshape our own belief about  who we are.

It can give us the freedom to highly appreciate what we are capable of and what we can become.

Next time you meet a drainer in your life. Analyse  and Decide.

We have a responsibility to live our own lives as well as we can, there’s no need to try to live each other’s as well-  let them handle their own.

I would rather Flat-iron My hair now!

Yes, Indeed. My latest hair treatment made me sick.

Why only now I have the nerve to come and talk about it?

Because I was scared. I was scared to make a big fuss about what happen to me after my treatment knowing there are probably 1,000 women out there who went and have their hair treated.

Second, I did not have enough proof  to support my theory.

Thanks for the noises the Brazilian blow out is  making right now. I think, it is getting the public spanking it deserves.

A simple girly want of having a Gwyneth Paltrow or Jennifer Aniston straight locks sent me sick for the entire month of August.

It all started with a trip and an inquiry to a popular salon in town. I was promised that it was a healthy “keratin” treatment that would strengthen my hair, coating it in powerful protein.

Giddy with girly excitement, I was clueless to what I was actually doing, let alone how it would affect me in the next few months.

And so willing mouse that I was , I made my appointment in middle of July.

I have struggled with to tame my unruly curls since my move to Canada. The weather and dry air made it unmanageable specially in the winter days.

The Salon professional as I may say, claim that the treatment can be used on any hair type, no matter how brittle, bleached, or over-processed your hair, it can make it look temporarily healthier, leaving hair looking shinier and smoother for up to 12 weeks.

During the treatment my hair first were shampooed , so as the keratin solution can bond with my hair shaft effectively, then the keratin is applied, waited for an hour reading magazine.

If the choking  fumes didn’t turn me off, certainly the eye and ear shield I was given  should have.

But right there back then, sting  and stench aside I knew I am going to love my new super-manageable hair.

Then I was rinsed and  the hair is blown dry, a stylist  uses a flat-iron after to activate the effect .

It cost me 200 bucks excluding the after treatment shampoos and conditioner that the stylist sold me on the virtue of the product.

And my new hair  – I love it. At first I did but over the next couple of weeks…something started to happen to me.

At first, I didn’t know why I was having all those weird feelings…I could not explain why nor the doctor I went to see me could not explain why.

I develop watery eyes, earache like someone pinching my ear canals, chest pain , nausea and headache.

These signs  are normally associated with a cold symptom but I did not believe it because It was in the middle of a hot Manitoba summer.

I was told by my doctor my ears look fine but there is some kind of a dried stuff in there but it is not inflamed  and that I’ve got eye strain, and this Doctor was not even mine because I went to a walk-in clinic.

I was sent home and was told to rest my eyes and take decongestants.

The whole month of August, I was dizzy and have headache and  my entire scalp feels so sensitive even a touch of a comb is unbearable.

I manage to survive that entire month, still clueless of what is happening .I documented each day what I feel in my diary, I went to chiropractor appointments if in case it has something to do with my neck and back ….the treatments were good but it never improve my watery , burning eyes on that month.

I never knew what was the culprit of  me being sick for a month  until I heard and read on the paper the Brazilian blow out treatment being scrutinized publicly.

I always knew in my heart, there’s got to be something. But it was all suspicion.

I tried to browse and read about the treatment I have and if it causes people to be sick.

I was astounded by the volume of articles and blogs about hair treatment.

Right now Canada have  banned  the Brazilian Blowout after finding unacceptable levels of formaldehyde in the product. In fact, the Canadian Government has gone further. Our health agency has pulled the Brazilian Blowout from the shelves and is warning stylists and consumers not to use it.

Fast forward, it is october now, my eyes feels a bit better but the watery and burning sensation still bothers me from time to time and I have a scheduled eye exam already on November.

You want to know something? I noticed some other changes too.

My normally thick and healthy black hair turn brownish, with split ends and fly aways.

Granted as a consumer, I should have been more cautious going to salon and allowing  a stylist  I never really knew gave me a treatment.

 But the thing is, I can not entirely blame the stylist, I myself have some part on it, because I gave my consent.

I guess,  hair treatment companies that lure people into believing that there products is 100% safe  should be more responsible enough to make people aware of the contents and ingredients, what is on the label should be what is on the bottle.

I found out that the Hair treatment I have , its promise of  slinky hair involved both keratin ( it’s a protein) and a secret active ingredient: formaldehyde.

The stuff I remember in Biology Class dissecting a frog. Yikes.

Our world really became ” an anything for beauty ” mentality. And I guess I was one of the catch because I jump in the bandwagon to join millions of women out there who craves a frizz-free hair.

I am grateful for my experiences allowing me to be a better informed consumer.

Next time someone ask me what about a  ” safe ” and formaldehyde-free  hair treatment ?

I will be quick to answer, NO, THANKS.

Perhaps for the meantime ,  I will definitely go back to using a hair dryer and a flat-iron to tame my curls .

before the treatment, notice the wavy and curly locks

after the treatment, notice it's sleek and straight

first few weeks after treatment

after several months-damaged hair after the treatment

Something New

Today, is a chilly day.

Fall is soon to be gone.

Bare trees, dark and dreary clouds, and below zero temperatures remind me that winter is just around the corner.

I still notice a flock of birds in the sky flying in a hurry to migrate to warmer places.

I never like winter. The extreme cold brings chapped lips, dry skin and hair, most of all there is some little wisps of loneliness in it.

Limited social gathering, limited outdoor activities and risky driving conditions could send my emotional stability spiraling down a bit out of control during the long cold winter days and nights here in Manitoba.

Sometimes, long winter can test your sanity, but once you are able to emerge victorious by being able to handle the physical discomfort it brings , you will be able to find it easier to tackle getting your over all sense of being in check.

Now, is the time for me to prepare for more lip smackers, nourishing lotion, and a pair of boots and mitts .

I just hope for a more warmer winter this year in Manitoba.

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